Dear Mama to be,
To be honest, I’ve been worried about you. Not because you’re not prepared, please. You’ve done all your homework mama. You washed and folded tiny socks, you painted the nursery wall, and you took the time to read the books.
You’ve stayed up late worrying and you went to bed early to get your sleep. But then you had to wake up 3 times throughout the night to pee. Unfortunately, pregnancy deems the bladder almost useless. It’s a design flaw I’ve certainly made known to God. All the same, you’re pressing forward. You ate only steak your first trimester because it’s all you were craving, or maybe you ate only lucky charms because it’s all you could keep down. Don’t worry, I know you ate at least one vegetable somewhere down the road in your pregnancy. That’s perfect! One vegetable is plenty. Congratulations, mama, you ARE rocking this.
My point being you are ready for this tiny human to enter the world. That’s the good news.
Unfortunately, there’s bad news too.
You know those books you read? Well, they didn’t tell you everything. And I know this because they didn’t tell me everything either. Those books lie. I can’t unpack in all in one post, but allow me to begin with this one honest truth:
Motherhood is full of cold coffee.
Don’t hear me incorrectly, here, I’m not talking about iced coffee. Because if there’s anyone who can enjoy an iced latte on a hot day, its me. There’s a big difference though because iced coffee is delivered with cold as its intention. What I’m talking about here is cold coffee. The kind that had hot as its intention. The kind that began with beans that were freshly ground, a coffee smell that infiltrated the air as it brewed and steam that escaped as the cup was poured. Its the kind in the picture above, which is probably the most beautiful cup of coffee I ever drank…or drunk?
But that was an hour ago, before you noticed dog pee in the corner that is undoubtedly from your dog who refused to go outside last night because it was raining. Or before the baby needed a diaper change, which led to an impromptu bath and a full outfit wash. Which led to having to empty the dryer, so you could empty the washer, this is how it goes. And certainly before you drove happily to daycare, only to realize that oh, its teacher-inservice day and there is no actual school.
I’m not mad at the teachers, or the dog, or the baby. I’m aware the cold coffee is actually none of their faults.
But there’s someone to blame for this frustration.
Its society. Its our culture. Its whoever made it look like motherhood was equivalent to falling in love in a Disney movie. Heck, maybe its Disney. Then again, I’ve seen a lot of beautiful playrooms on Pintrest. They look nothing like my real house, so maybe its Pintrest. You know what? It doesn’t matter who is to blame.
What matters, Mama, is that you have read this. And together, we are going to get this right. At least now you know that if motherhood is in your future, so is cold coffee. And a lot of it.
Cold coffee doesn’t sound great, I know, but don’t worry. Theres always the microwave, or attempting to make a fresh pot should you be feeling especially ambitious.
Other people will tell you, “its all worth it”, but I will tell you, that is to be determined. For me, this just depends on two things. 1. How wealthy Ray becomes and 2. How willing he is to share his wealth.
Only kidding.
On a serious note, here’s what I can tell you about drinking cold coffee.
You will feel like you’re the only one doing it, like all the other moms are getting to sip hot Starbucks in their beautiful and well organized playrooms. It’s a lie. No one and I do mean NO ONE is doing that. We’re all collectively in this together, bringing our kid to daycare on the wrong day begging the principal to take him for a few hours. Ok, that specific scenario maybe just me.
Anyhow, we are all drinking cold coffee together. Take solace in that. I’m not just going to tell you that and leave it there though. Here are a few good resources if you’re interested or need to connect with a cold-coffee-drinking mama:
- THIS article gives details on 20 Facebook Mom groups that are “worth joining.”
- Here are 10 ways to find mom groups outside of Facebook.
- And because I’m a HUGE podcast nerd, here are “The 7 Best Podcasts for Moms.”
- Also, if you liked this post, I’d recommend my other posts, Win Some, Loose Most, My New Parenting Slogan, or The Best Medicine – My Weekend Away or one of my all time favorites Baby Ray’s Birth Story.
Until next week, cheers and I wish you warm coffee! Also, if you enjoyed the post be sure to subscribe to my email list!